I recently received a few client messages that share a common theme:

• “I started out great, then the first weekend hit & I blew it.”

• “My mornings are fine & then I’m out of control when I come home from work.”

• “I don’t know if I can stay motivated.” 

The common thread here isn’t about excuses, although these do sound like excuses.  It’s about having low expectations. 

There is a behavioral theory called the Expectancy Effect (also called the Rosenthal Effect & the Pygmalion Effect) which has been studied for decades by a Harvard professor named Dr. Rosenthal. 

The research started with rats…but I’m gonna skip over the rats & go right to the humans. Dr. Rosenthal wanted to investigate factors that influence how children performed in school.

He conducted a study on kids in an elementary school who took what the teachers thought was an IQ test.  Dr. Rosenthal & his team of researchers gave the names of certain students to the teachers & told the teachers that that particular group of students showed great academic potential. The teachers were instructed to keep this information private & to treat these children as normally as possible.

Unbeknownst to the teachers the test was not really an IQ test. It showed nothing.  The researchers just randomly picked 20% of the class to see how the teachers would respond & how they would treat them based on their preconceived notions of academic performance. As expected the children in the 20% did dramatically better than the other 80% of the students in the class.  They were given more opportunities, the teachers had higher expectations of them & those higher expectations lead to higher performance.

The teachers expected more from them & the students delivered! 

This phenomenon has been demonstrated in higher education, in the Air Force Academy, in businesses & in courtrooms.  When we expect more we see a higher level of performance & conversely when we expect less we see a lower level of performance.

I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “If you think you can’t, you’re right.” 

It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

If you think about it, we do this to other people all the time!  Perhaps you’ve thought someone you recently met was snooty, stuck-up, or rude.  That first impression changed how you treat them.  Furthermore how you treat them alters their behavior to match. In other words, people respond to your cues just as you respond to theirs. AND you respond to the cues you give yourself! 

Freaky, isn’t it?!

The most important part of this is that we do it to ourselves almost unconsciously.  We will behave “as if”.  We look for & expect certain behaviors of ourselves & then we confirm our suspicions.  We WANT to be right & therefore we prove that we are right by behaving in the expected way.

Here’s what I mean….

When you focus on how you always screw things up,  how you have always been inconsistent, that it’s harder for you (more so than anyone else) to change your behavior, that you always make terrible choices on the weekends, that once the bag of chips is open you cannot control yourself… 

You expect it & you deliver. 

You cannot & you will not exceed your own expectations.

So, if you want to improve your performance, improve your expectations!

What do you expect of yourself? How do you expect you’ll behave in certain situations?

• “I always overeat when we go out.”

• “Once I start drinking all bets are off.”

• “My weekends are a total disaster.”

• “The week before I start my period, I eat everything that’s not nailed down.”

Those low expectations will influence your performance & create your reality.

But… it doesn’t have to be that way! 

Higher expectations will improve your performance just as much as low expectations will diminish your performance.

Start asking questions….

• “What am I creating through my expectations?”

• “If I want to improve my behavior or my choices or my results, how can raise my own expectations of myself?”

• “How can I improve my choices?”

• “How can I create the habits I want?”

• “How can I make myself proud today?”

• “What can I control?”

It’s super simple if you let it be this simple! You are in complete control of everything you put into your mouth!  Every day, you are capable of making slightly better choices. Look for chances to make yourself proud.

You can use this anywhere, too.  

Use this on your spouse. If you always talk about how your spouse is so insensitive, then that is exactly what they will be. They live into that expectation…so if you want to improve their performance, improve your expectation & then tell them….

“Wow that was so thoughtful!  You made me feel special. Thank you for that!”

They will live into & up to that expectation. And so will you!

Use this on your children. If you tell them that they are always messy & they never clean up after themselves, then that is your expectation of them & they will live up to that.

Change it…

“Here is your laundry.  Thank you for putting it away & picking up your room today!” 

Now…. use it on yourself! 

My expectations:

• I expect that I will go to the gym every day, & so I do
• I expect that I will eat as clean as I can in every situation, & so I do.
• I expect to be kind to myself when I DON’T eat as clean as I can in every situation, & so I do.
• I expect to meditate to practice re-directing my thoughts, & so I do.
• I expect to raise my level of awareness through slowing down my thought process when making decisions, & so I do.
• I expect to give my body what it needs, when it needs it, & so I do.

Improve your expectations AND you will improve your performance!   

“Loving Every Moment”

~ Laurie

If you are interested in learning more about working with Laurie, click the link on her website.