As some of you know I play piano. I’ve been taking lessons & playing in recitals for years & years & years & years…. Aside from my love for the instrument & classical music, I find my piano practice to be the perfect place to experiment & learn. When I try new practice & performance methods, I get a chance to feel like “a beginner”, to feel uncomfortable, to feel out of sorts, to feel like my athletes feel when I ask them to change their techniques. The best part is that it gives me relatability – I can put myself into their shoes & experience the same frustrations, disappointments, irritations & impatience that are integral to the learning process. Which brings me to my question: Do you have a Practice Buddy?
Recently, in a Sunday swim session, one of my athletes mentioned how angry & mad they got at themselves during a workout. They shared how they started to feel incapable of completing the workout as written…and as a result…the negative self-talk kicked in. Well, we all know what happens when we enter the negative self-talk stage – a whole lotta nothing productive!
My athlete’s experience prompted me to tell you about a new practice tool, which I’ve been experimenting with – the assistance of a “Practice Buddy”. Now…I’ll just say right of the bat (pun TOTALLY intended!!) that this tool is NOT for everyone. It’s bizarre, it’s a bit silly…at first, you’ll feel ridiculous…but hey…I’m willing to give anything a try if there’s a chance that it’ll help!
A Practice Buddy is something (could be anything…a stapler, an eraser, a little statue, a stuffed animal (personally, my fav) that you can talk to about your progress, your challenges, your successes & your difficulties. Here’s how I use mine in piano practice:
- I play a section of challenging music.
- I take a moment to assess how it went.
- I tell my Practice Buddy (yes, I talk to it out loud) about how “Michelle” played – the good & the not so good. (NOTE: It is critical that you use the 3rd person when talking to your Practice Buddy. I’ll discuss why in a bit.)
- I decide what I want to change going forward.
- Then I play the same section of music again with the change…and the #2-5 process starts all over.
Lather…rinse…repeat…as many times as needed to feel like I’ve improved the section.
As I mentioned above, talking to your Practice Buddy in the 3rd person is critical. So, I say things like…
- Michelle did a nice job of following the dynamics of playing louder, then softer.
- Michelle’s right arm felt a bit tight when she made the jump up to that higher chord.
- Michelle might want to try a different fingering pattern.
Using 3rd Person Talk
Why is talking in the 3rd person so important? Because when we don’t use “I”, “me” or “my”, we create distance between us & our assessments. In other words, it helps us to think about ourselves much like we would think about someone else. And this distancing process helps diminishes our egos thereby increasing objectivity. All of which help us regulate our emotional response to what just happened. In other words, 3rd person dialogue keeps us calmer, cooler & more rational! And I don’t need to tell you that calmer minds produce better results!
How might you use this Practice Buddy concept during a workout? Well, you just need find you a Workout Buddy! What about your water bottle?? That might make the perfect Workout Buddy! So, when things aren’t going as planned, just start talking to your Workout Buddy…telling it about the things that _____________ (insert your name here) is doing well & the things that _______________ needs to change. And who knows…you just might find your workout going a whole lot better!
If you try this, I’d LOVE to hear how it works. Post in Comments down below or in our Fitter Stronger Faster Facebook group. Good luck!
For an excellent read on how an ultra-endurance athlete used 3rd person talk to stay calm & cool, here’s a good article.